What is it about internet flash games that hook me harder than cocaine? Why can I play a free game on the internet for hours on end, while my expensive-all gaming systems sit by the television, relatively unused? And what keeps me coming back to a game which pales in comparison to the original Super Mario in complexity and graphic development, months after I’ve beaten the game?
Case in point: Dino Run.
In Dino Run, you play as an adorable 8-bit li’l dino named whatever-the-heck you want. The Dino Apocalypse is neigh, but there’s hope- a safe haven within a mountain, filled with enough food, water, and sexy li’l lady dinos to satisfy your walnut-sized brain for the rest of your natural life.
The only problem is getting there. Asteroids are already hitting, and there’s a wall of dust and volcanic ash heading straight at you, fast.
Thus, the entire premise of Dino Run. Outrun the wall of death, make it to the end of the run, live happily ever after.
It’s not all that easy though. There are cliffs, pitfalls, falling asteroids, and slow f***ing stegosauri that get in your way, because they obviously have no interest in living and don’t care that you do. You will curse at these things. A lot. But there are helpful things in your world: pterodactyls will give you a lift if you jump into their claws, and parasaurolophus will give you a speedy ride. Flowers throughout the courses will give you boosts of speed or higher jumps, and collecting eggs, SuperEggs, and bones will result in upgrades to your adorable little dino.
And, other than the ability for race against other players online for a sheer pretentious sense of superiority, that is the entire game.
And this is what kept me from studying for two exams, took up three train rides, and kept me from writing a paper until three o’clock in the morning before the paper was due. And somehow, months after beating the game’s final stage, I think, “Oh, I wonder if Dino Run is still fun and crazy addictive”. The answer is yes, yes it is.
I still have two stats that aren’t full and like 3 super eggs I haven’t found. Not to mention all of the bonus features I still haven’t unlocked.
Get out of my way, you f***ing stegosaurus.
Dino Run by PixelJAM